


Eridan Ampora Has a Problem

by FingerstheZombie



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Gender Dysphoria
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-10-04
Updated: 2012-10-04
Packaged: 2017-11-15 15:24:25
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 718
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/528719
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FingerstheZombie/pseuds/FingerstheZombie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This entire thing is one long run on sentence.</p>
    </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This entire thing is one long run on sentence.

He wasn't expecting it when the thought first settled upon him. It's not every day that one can go to their mirror and notice the slight differences. There's a long moment of silence when he starts to feel along his jaw, because before it wasn't that curved was it? Eridan Ampora is five sweeps old and he isn't sure what to make of this. He slowly takes off the cape, and then his scarf and once he's done he pulls off his shirt and stands shock still. There's something off something very off and it tickles at the base of his brain stem and curls up in his still dark eyes. Hands to his chest and it feels like there's a bit more fat there, more than before and he wonders if he's not been FLARPing hard enough.

But he knows that him and Vriska have been at it every hour that they can afford, his claws dig in slightly and he lets his hand drop to either side of his body. He slips his thumbs into the waistband of the striped pants he has equipped and dips it down. Nothing's changed, or are they tighter around the waist than they were before? He feels confusion bubble up and he inspects his hands, claws glint jewel bright and he turns them over, over and over again. His throat feels dry and he clears it before pulling his pants back up. 

Eridan Ampora thinks he's being paranoid, the splatters of lusus and troll blood on his person being evidence that it's all just the hype from the session earlier today. He gets cleaned up and the inspection gets tucked away with the slow sound of water filling the tub.


	2. Chapter 2

There's times in which puberty can kick in pretty late. There's no real baseline, just that around five to six sweeps young trolls start to get bigger, stronger, claws sharper, teeth harder. Scars heal and become thick unyielding flesh; the whole event usually ends around eight or nine sweeps. He knows he's supposed to be feeling different but there's something that's jabbing in his belly that won't sit right with him. He feels meaner, too mean poisonous jealousy and he hangs onto Vriska so hard that he thinks they might break.

He tries to tell Feferi that he feels bad, feels wrong in his skin but she won't listen to him even when he has her ear because things go in but she doesn't hear him and understand what it is. Trolls rarely touch outside of quadrants and he sorely wants her to touch him wants her to pity him until his heart bleeds out and he won't be able to save himself sometimes. But lately, even the mistaken brushes and little paps and shooshes haven't been doing anything but making him feel queasy and sick. He feels heavy-headed and bogged down by her, and it registers that they are becoming more alike in figure and he wants to puke and rip his eyes out because when he rakes them down her body he sees himself and what's changing and he'd been denying it for too long. 

When he gets home he heads to his respite block and gets undressed. He's a mess, but that comes with the job. His hive is the wreck of Dualscar's ship and he's always loved it always but he feels that he's not right. He can't be Dualscar's descendent if he's going to be a **female** of all things. Someone's been feeding him pebbles and they are lined up rightly and his lusus hasn't asked him if he'd like to be getting things in girl sizes. Everything's in male and he can't help but cling to the swell of affection he feels for the briny old beast. Eridan manages to take a picture and he sets it aside because he knows what to do.

There are ways to stop this. Eridan's heard of trolls who mature towards the wrong gender. It's a good thing he can afford the treatments to halt it. He hopes that they work, he does because he doesn't want to get any more hourglass shaped, he doesn't want the rumblespheres, he doesn't want his voice to get any softer than it already has gotten. How blind could he of been?


End file.
